#ITSOKAYTOTALK - Mental Illness

[Neuk]

Eh not so much. Just taking one day at a time, it's tough dealing with some health mysteries and having to go back to the doctor every time there's a problem that only they can sort out. It's just one thing after another, I'm just tired of all the curve balls I have to deal with.

Other than that, for some strange reason, road running has been on the back of my mind for a while now and I think I want to start running again soon. I"m extremely unfit so I guess I will have to start slow and then build up from there - a day at a time. I'm also lazy so it's going to take some real courage and motivation to get going and keep at it.

Sorry to hear @RainstormZA, I hope the health mysteries get sorted out soon. Not that I would recommend not seeing a medical professional, but do as much research yourself as possible and perhaps get second and even third opinions.

Get out on the road and run! I don't enjoy running but I take our puppy twice a week for a 4 - 5 km run.

 

[Neuk]

I hope everyone else is well?

Personal work continues, physical training is picking up nicely with two runs, two Watt bike sessions, two yoga sessions, an action cricket game and a medium distance mountain bike ride a week. I am trying to get in to more regular meditation to see if it helps with my temper issues, I have a tendency to over react to irritable or stressful situations. I have admittedly gotten a lot better as I have gotten older but can improve a lot and have various reasons why I need to get better at it. I need to remember to not be so critical of myself and to stick to working at it...

 

[Chickenstrip]

OK feedback - still suffering from insomnia and depression , but getting there , they gave me Seroquel xr 50 mg , hope this will help ?

Seroquel is the bee's knees. It's really a fantastic medication. You just feel super chilled out. However, if you've ever had the muchies, well... Seroquel removes the "full" sensation. So you can literally eat yourself into a coma and still be hungry. I gained 30kg on that stuff before I just refused to take it anymore. The weight took over a year to come off. So use with caution. Think I was on 150 though, I don't take anything anymore but man that stuff was a love hate for me.

 

[Chickenstrip]

Seroquel is the bee's knees. It's really a fantastic medication. You just feel super chilled out. However, if you've ever had the muchies, well... Seroquel removes the "full" sensation. So you can literally eat yourself into a coma and still be hungry. I gained 30kg on that stuff before I just refused to take it anymore. The weight took over a year to come off. So use with caution. Think I was on 150 though, I don't take anything anymore but man that stuff was a love hate for me.

Oh yeah, and do yourself a favour @ARYANTO . Take it late afternoon/ early evening 6pm was great for me. The XR should last you for most of the following day and it REALLY helps with sleep. So much so that a morning dose might make you lethargic all day. Again, 50 seems like an oddly low dose though. Ignore this advice if you've got split doses.

 

[RainstormZA]

Sorry to hear @RainstormZA, I hope the health mysteries get sorted out soon. Not that I would recommend not seeing a medical professional, but do as much research yourself as possible and perhaps get second and even third opinions.

Get out on the road and run! I don't enjoy running but I take our puppy twice a week for a 4 - 5 km run.

Yeah good running shoes don't come cheap and I want to be well prepared for the contact impact as I've had running injuries from bad shoes. So I gotta save up for the right shoes and having lost around 23kg since June last year, I do need smaller sized clothes. I have gone from 18 to 14 and possibly down to 12 now, going to browse all the charity shops tomorrow as I have the day off and see what they have. Seriously all of my clothes are too big now, I"m struggling to even keep my 14 jeans up. Lol. I'm also considering joining up a ladies gym for the yoga and pilates classes - however the only thing holding me back is they are held in the evenings and my eyes aren't good for night driving.

 

[RainstormZA]

Yeah good running shoes don't come cheap and I want to be well prepared for the contact impact as I've had running injuries from bad shoes. So I gotta save up for the right shoes and having lost around 23kg since June last year, I do need smaller sized clothes. I have gone from 18 to 14 and possibly down to 12 now, going to browse all the charity shops tomorrow as I have the day off and see what they have. Seriously all of my clothes are too big now, I"m struggling to even keep my 14 jeans up. Lol. I'm also considering joining up a ladies gym for the yoga and pilates classes - however the only thing holding me back is they are held in the evenings and my eyes aren't good for night driving.

And speak of the devil, I have indeed gone down to a size 12. Shirts are now 16 from an 18. Unfortunately boobs don't shrink as much as the rest of the body lol

 

[vicTor]

And speak of the devil, I have indeed gone down to a size 12. Shirts are now 16 from an 18. Unfortunately boobs don't shrink as much as the rest of the body lol

howzit

not sure if you here many howzit's that side ?

so you still vaping etc ?

still mixing up that mint adv ?

regards

 

[ARYANTO]

Oh yeah, and do yourself a favour @ARYANTO . Take it late afternoon/ early evening 6pm was great for me. The XR should last you for most of the following day and it REALLY helps with sleep. So much so that a morning dose might make you lethargic all day. Again, 50 seems like an oddly low dose though. Ignore this advice if you've got split doses.

Thanks , I take mine 7/8 pm but it tends to make me groggy and short fused the next day - told the psyc but she keeps on prescribing it , only take it now @weekends.

 

[Raindance]

And speak of the devil, I have indeed gone down to a size 12. Shirts are now 16 from an 18. Unfortunately boobs don't shrink as much as the rest of the body lol

No man will ever complain about that my dear....

Regards

 

[RainstormZA]

howzit

not sure if you here many howzit's that side ?

so you still vaping etc ?

still mixing up that mint adv ?

regards

Yes still mixing - in fact yesterday I just mixed a litre of that stuff. It lasts me around 4 to 5 months. I have absolutely no desire to go back to cigarettes and considering the fact, I spend a lot of time around smokers, when you quit, you forget over time how bad the smell can be until youy work with someone that smokes.

Got to say, I am vaping a lot more than I should. I guess I can blame stress. Lol.

 

[ARYANTO]

Well , today is two years ago that my world tumbled into one sorry heap , The day my Mom died . Tried to work my day around it but it still hurts like hell. I am glad that I'm on anti deps otherwise this would have been one major trainsmash day.

 

[Room Fogger]

Well , today is two years ago that my world tumbled into one sorry heap , The day my Mom died . Tried to work my day around it but it still hurts like hell. I am glad that I'm on anti deps otherwise this would have been one major trainsmash day.

Thinking of you meneer, it’s a trying time, hang in there!

 

[Neuk]

Yeah good running shoes don't come cheap and I want to be well prepared for the contact impact as I've had running injuries from bad shoes. So I gotta save up for the right shoes and having lost around 23kg since June last year, I do need smaller sized clothes. I have gone from 18 to 14 and possibly down to 12 now, going to browse all the charity shops tomorrow as I have the day off and see what they have. Seriously all of my clothes are too big now, I"m struggling to even keep my 14 jeans up. Lol. I'm also considering joining up a ladies gym for the yoga and pilates classes - however the only thing holding me back is they are held in the evenings and my eyes aren't good for night driving.

That is great to hear that you have lost so much weight and need new clothes! I would suggest yoga, I started it with my girlfriends family and despite struggling am enjoying it so far.

 

[Neuk]

Well , today is two years ago that my world tumbled into one sorry heap , The day my Mom died . Tried to work my day around it but it still hurts like hell. I am glad that I'm on anti deps otherwise this would have been one major trainsmash day.

I am sorry for your loss, it is perfectly normal to feel the pain of the loss though.

 

[Neuk]

A mini update from me, I have been doing OK, had a few up and down weeks with last week and this week seeing me struggle to keep my routine for various reasons. I am also on a mission to get a grip on my anger issues as it is affecting my relationship with my girlfriend negatively which I want to minimise as much as possible. At the moment I am just going day by day...

 

[RainstormZA]

That is great to hear that you have lost so much weight and need new clothes! I would suggest yoga, I started it with my girlfriends family and despite struggling am enjoying it so far.

Yeah it's a great feeling being in control of my eating habits this time. I have absolute no desire to start overeating again, I have struggled with this for most of my life - if I so much lost weight, I would suddenly put it back on out of fear that I would lose too much (my sister had anorexia, I was the total opposite). I am really lucky to have found someone who is there for me thick and thin, telling me that it is all good and that he will tell me if I lose too much. That's when you stop and realise that you need to stop worrying about the mundane things in life and just enjoy each day as it comes and goes. Life is short. In some good ways, he has changed my mindset on work and life, I've also learnt to grow a thicker skin when it comes to abrasive, judgemental people. I no longer care what they think. There is someone out there that definitely will appreciate and accept you for the way you are and you need to do the same. I think it's been a real blessing coming to the UK - in so many ways it's changed me for the better. I laugh more easily, I laugh loud and people look at me with a huge smile on their faces. I lost something and gained something in return, a reward for letting it all go.

I was just thinking today how lucky I am and how much I have come through after 10 years of healing myself and my own mind. I am now doing the same, paying it forward and taking one day at a time. I'm also binge watching cooking shows on Youtube and laughing my ass off at the most silly things such as Barry Lewis, God that guy and his wife are hilarious...

Even despite all of these positive things happening, I actually injured myself at work - repetitive strain injury - all this from repeated certain actions such as peeling potatoes, banging my hand by accident and getting my hand / wrist squashed all has taken its toll on my right wrist so I am having to use my left hand, which isn't an issue as I"m ambidextrous, I can write with my left too. I still have the occasional anxiety / panic attacks but I am working on it and forcing myself to face my fears. Today a customer spoke to me and I was this close to blanking out as usual as I'm terrified of dealing with strangers. But today, I wasn't even sure what he said and I said I don't play golf. He just chuckled and walked away so I obviously said something right and not have a panic attack. That felt good.

I have been considering signing up for yoga at the local gym when it gets lighter after March as I am not good for driving at night. I am still looking for a better place to rent for the next winter season, it was horrid enough living here through it.

Oh and I have apparently been offered to come over to Amsterdam in June/July for a few days this year as my mother wants me to come and visit them on the boat while they are there. I need a schengen visa to go over there so we will see what happens.

 

[Neuk]

Yeah it's a great feeling being in control of my eating habits this time. I have absolute no desire to start overeating again, I have struggled with this for most of my life - if I so much lost weight, I would suddenly put it back on out of fear that I would lose too much (my sister had anorexia, I was the total opposite). I am really lucky to have found someone who is there for me thick and thin, telling me that it is all good and that he will tell me if I lose too much. That's when you stop and realise that you need to stop worrying about the mundane things in life and just enjoy each day as it comes and goes. Life is short. In some good ways, he has changed my mindset on work and life, I've also learnt to grow a thicker skin when it comes to abrasive, judgemental people. I no longer care what they think. There is someone out there that definitely will appreciate and accept you for the way you are and you need to do the same. I think it's been a real blessing coming to the UK - in so many ways it's changed me for the better. I laugh more easily, I laugh loud and people look at me with a huge smile on their faces. I lost something and gained something in return, a reward for letting it all go.

I was just thinking today how lucky I am and how much I have come through after 10 years of healing myself and my own mind. I am now doing the same, paying it forward and taking one day at a time. I'm also binge watching cooking shows on Youtube and laughing my ass off at the most silly things such as Barry Lewis, God that guy and his wife are hilarious...

Even despite all of these positive things happening, I actually injured myself at work - repetitive strain injury - all this from repeated certain actions such as peeling potatoes, banging my hand by accident and getting my hand / wrist squashed all has taken its toll on my right wrist so I am having to use my left hand, which isn't an issue as I"m ambidextrous, I can write with my left too. I still have the occasional anxiety / panic attacks but I am working on it and forcing myself to face my fears. Today a customer spoke to me and I was this close to blanking out as usual as I'm terrified of dealing with strangers. But today, I wasn't even sure what he said and I said I don't play golf. He just chuckled and walked away so I obviously said something right and not have a panic attack. That felt good.

I have been considering signing up for yoga at the local gym when it gets lighter after March as I am not good for driving at night. I am still looking for a better place to rent for the next winter season, it was horrid enough living here through it.

Oh and I have apparently been offered to come over to Amsterdam in June/July for a few days this year as my mother wants me to come and visit them on the boat while they are there. I need a schengen visa to go over there so we will see what happens.

That all sounds really positive Please keep us updated!

 

[Adephi]

 

[acorn]

I'm just going to leave this here...



Sent from my SNE-LX2 using Tapatalk

 

[ARYANTO]

 

[ARYANTO]

https://psychcentral.com/
Some reading/ advise .

 

[Viper_SA]

Well hello everyone. I see this thread has been very quiet of late, which I hope means that everyone is doing well.
Just an update on my story. Towards the end of 2019 and into early 2020 I was drinking like a fish, as in 3 to 4 bottles of Gin a week. Had a few close calls with the breathalyzer tests at work, hardly slept at all and was contemplating suicide on a daily basis. My psychologist threatened me with a court order and so off I went to Denmar Psychiatric Hospital for two weeks. Got to see a new doctor, new meds and even managed to make a few new friends (pity they all lost touch with me after I was discharged). I felt much better at the time and shortly after being discharged the dreaded lockdown hit us. So it was a bit difficult to judge just how well, or not, I was doing. One positive was that alcohol tasted absolutely vulgar to me and I almost quit it completely.
Went back for my follow up and complained to the doctor that my memory was really bad. As is REALLY bad. My boss would ask me to do something and two hours later I'd have no recollection at all that he asked anything from me. To the point where we almost had arguments about it. So the doc reckoned I also have ADHD and threw some more meds my way. I told her that I had been on a trial with ADHD drugs before and that they made my anxiety much worse, but she insisted that it was other factors that made me anxious. Long story short, I felt like I was dying during the two weeks I was on the ADHD meds. Chest pains, diarrhea, headaches and my anxiety was through the roof. Then came the time to get my prescription filled and only then did I realize that she had also made 3 other changes to my meds. Among them a reduction in my anxiety meds. My friendly pharmacist tried contacting her via phone as he was certain she had just omitted it from my script. She refused to speak to him and only had her receptionist inform him that I had full knowledge of the changes, which I did not. This forced me to simply stop the ADHD meds and rethink my treatment. I decided that I was not feeling any better, apart from not drinking, and started a slow process of gradually reducing my meds. Financially, especially with covid and salary cuts in the mix, it was hard paying R3k a month on co-payments anyway. So since mid September I have been off any sort of psychiatric medication. The first few weeks were great. I had much more energy and was very positive about the future.
Gradually though things have taken a turn for the worse again and I am battling daily with severe anxiety, depression and I am very emotional. Hell, I started crying like a baby while watching American Idol as I just felt overwhelmed with emotions. Shit, I almost shed a tear during an IPL match or two where some gutsy performance spoke to me.
I have not seen my psychologist since the lockdown, mainly because my medical aid is depleted and I just dont have the funds. I did however make a plan to see her this upcoming Friday because I'm losing my mind a bit. The smallest thing sets me off and pisses me off, and 10 minutes later I want to cry and feel ashamed of my behavior. I'm going to totally lose it I fear, so I guess it's back to my psychologist. Will just have to find a way financially. Also looking for yet another psychiatrist now. I have been to 4 different ones in as many years and they can't even agree on a diagnoses. So fed up with it all.
Also looking at going back to the psychiatric hospital next year once my medical aid has refreshed, but no idea which doctor to see there or which hospital to choose. This year I went with a recommendation from my psychologist, but that didnt work out so well. I have a few names from people who were admitted with me, but it's so hard to choose a doctor. This year I took annual leave and fit it in there so I didn't have to be off sick and no-oe at work knew I was there. That would be the last thing I need is gossip about the office crazy.

I am sorry for the extremely long read, but it does help to just throw it all out there every once in a while. I might have quit vaping and fully aboard the stinky train these days, but there are still some very special people on this forum that have helped me in the past. Hope you all are well.

 

[Dela Rey Steyn]

Well hello everyone. I see this thread has been very quiet of late, which I hope means that everyone is doing well.
Just an update on my story. Towards the end of 2019 and into early 2020 I was drinking like a fish, as in 3 to 4 bottles of Gin a week. Had a few close calls with the breathalyzer tests at work, hardly slept at all and was contemplating suicide on a daily basis. My psychologist threatened me with a court order and so off I went to Denmar Psychiatric Hospital for two weeks. Got to see a new doctor, new meds and even managed to make a few new friends (pity they all lost touch with me after I was discharged). I felt much better at the time and shortly after being discharged the dreaded lockdown hit us. So it was a bit difficult to judge just how well, or not, I was doing. One positive was that alcohol tasted absolutely vulgar to me and I almost quit it completely.
Went back for my follow up and complained to the doctor that my memory was really bad. As is REALLY bad. My boss would ask me to do something and two hours later I'd have no recollection at all that he asked anything from me. To the point where we almost had arguments about it. So the doc reckoned I also have ADHD and threw some more meds my way. I told her that I had been on a trial with ADHD drugs before and that they made my anxiety much worse, but she insisted that it was other factors that made me anxious. Long story short, I felt like I was dying during the two weeks I was on the ADHD meds. Chest pains, diarrhea, headaches and my anxiety was through the roof. Then came the time to get my prescription filled and only then did I realize that she had also made 3 other changes to my meds. Among them a reduction in my anxiety meds. My friendly pharmacist tried contacting her via phone as he was certain she had just omitted it from my script. She refused to speak to him and only had her receptionist inform him that I had full knowledge of the changes, which I did not. This forced me to simply stop the ADHD meds and rethink my treatment. I decided that I was not feeling any better, apart from not drinking, and started a slow process of gradually reducing my meds. Financially, especially with covid and salary cuts in the mix, it was hard paying R3k a month on co-payments anyway. So since mid September I have been off any sort of psychiatric medication. The first few weeks were great. I had much more energy and was very positive about the future.
Gradually though things have taken a turn for the worse again and I am battling daily with severe anxiety, depression and I am very emotional. Hell, I started crying like a baby while watching American Idol as I just felt overwhelmed with emotions. Shit, I almost shed a tear during an IPL match or two where some gutsy performance spoke to me.
I have not seen my psychologist since the lockdown, mainly because my medical aid is depleted and I just dont have the funds. I did however make a plan to see her this upcoming Friday because I'm losing my mind a bit. The smallest thing sets me off and pisses me off, and 10 minutes later I want to cry and feel ashamed of my behavior. I'm going to totally lose it I fear, so I guess it's back to my psychologist. Will just have to find a way financially. Also looking for yet another psychiatrist now. I have been to 4 different ones in as many years and they can't even agree on a diagnoses. So fed up with it all.
Also looking at going back to the psychiatric hospital next year once my medical aid has refreshed, but no idea which doctor to see there or which hospital to choose. This year I went with a recommendation from my psychologist, but that didnt work out so well. I have a few names from people who were admitted with me, but it's so hard to choose a doctor. This year I took annual leave and fit it in there so I didn't have to be off sick and no-oe at work knew I was there. That would be the last thing I need is gossip about the office crazy.

I am sorry for the extremely long read, but it does help to just throw it all out there every once in a while. I might have quit vaping and fully aboard the stinky train these days, but there are still some very special people on this forum that have helped me in the past. Hope you all are well.

Good to have you around again @Viper_SA ! Remember, talking about ourselves and our struggles is one of the best therapies available (It's basically what people pay phycologists for!) Sorry to hear about your issues with the psychiatrist. I honestly haven't heard of a decent one in SA. Denmar is a great place, had friends that went there and friends that worked there as nurses. Unfortunately staying there permanently isn't really an option for most. Glad you are reaching out and still fighting to be yourself. Sincerely hope you get the proper help you seek from a medical professional you deserve and that is not just going to push the "latest greatest pills" on to you. Stay strong bud. You are a champ!

 

[ARYANTO]

Well here's my update - been going to JHB Academic on a monthly basis and that their Psyc dept is one of the best , I suffer from PTSD ,at a stage it was really bad .Insomnia , depression and one hell of a temper , nobody wanted to be near me just incase something set me off , but after attending their clinic and a proper diagnosis , I am back to my normal self . Using anti anxiety[1] and anti depressant[1] tablets and a sleeping pill at night there is a marked improvement , my tablets costs me R100.00 dispensation fee once a month .

 

[Viper_SA]

I should really post an update on this thread. So much has happened since I last posted here, but I'm back and off the stinkies (even if it was by accident, lol) I hope everyone is doing okay?