I hope that you are doing better budI hope that you respond to my WhatsApp when you get a chance...
Must have missed it while clearing my WhatsApp messages, sorry
#ITSOKAYTOTALK - Mental Illness
- Thread starter brotiform
- Start date
Must have missed it while clearing my WhatsApp messages, sorry
It's that self worth that is the biggest problem. I have always looked after other people before myself. I must say that since I got married to my husband he has taught me a lot and I have become a stronger person, but I still tend to want to please other people more than myself and want to rather see them happy and satisfied. I went through a few rough years in my past and for some reason some days those things kreep up again. Doesnt help to go see a shrink they cant help me I need to learn to move on.
Regarding my current situation with the ex friend. I got up this morning and decided enough of trying to fix things and trying to explain my side. I barely have any friends so loosing one of the none I had its probably not a loss then. I'm just going to focus on the things going on at the moment and see the good in it. Hard leason learned, but don't we learn something new every day.
Yoh there is a few that comes to mind. But then again if it didnt happen I wouldnt be where I am today. Wouldnt have had the love of my life supporting me, wouldnt have lived in Saldanha and probably wouldnt have had the work at home job I have. So if I can go back and change those and still have what I have today I would want to go back when I was 5 years old when something really bad happend and due to that I'm a T1 diabetic. I would give anything not to be a diabetic. Just to live a normal live without complications.
Losing my shit a bit tonight. Trying to follow my own advice and not beg and plead, trying to not blame myself for everything that went wrong in my relationship, and my general stress and anxiety is way up. Quit drinking cold turkey on Saturday night after breaking down and crying at my favorite pub. Sunday morning I poured around R2k's worth of single malt scotch down the drain. It doesn't solve anything and makes me feel like shit the next day anyway. Realised I wasn't drinking for pleasure anymore, and using it as a coping mechanism. I literally drank to get plastered enough to forget my problems and pass out. Not worth it, but still suffering. Nothing beats getting plastered and feeling sorry for yourself when your heart is broken. I'm not going to win Christian of the year awards, but tonight I'm asking for prayers please, whatever your religion is. Thanks for all the PM's to date from all you great people.
I won’t be winning that prize either, but will have a couple of words on your behalf as well tonight. Peace to you, and patience when needed. Pouring out the booze may sound like sacrilege to some, but the best thing you could have done. Since my mishap in Jan I’ve learned you don’t need it to have fun, who could have known. Stay strong meneer, a lot of people are standing behind you.
I wouldn't use the button. I am what I am because of everything that I have been through in life - good and bad.
Sent by iDad's iPhone
Exactly! My last drink was December. A whole bottle of white rum in 2 days. Omw. I rather spend the money on vape stuff.
Feeling a little better this morning. Thanks everyone. I swear I had a dream where I saw happier times ahead and it made me feel so much better.
Still very anxious this morning, but hopeful. We'll what the future holds.
Like @RenaldoRheeder has said, I am the man I am today because of my past but I am fully in control of my future, I wouldn't hit rewind or fast forward.
Self worth and confidence has been one of my biggest issues throughout my life and only in my mid to late thirties am I learning to put myself ahead of others when I need to but not so much that I turn in to a self absorbed, narcissistic, egotistical asshole. I have always been on the too generous side of the scale so it is taking long to learn where the fine balance is...
Good for you bud
I enjoy a drink every now and then but I drink far, far, far less than I used to and I find myself not wanting to drink these days. I feel far better not having a drink at times, both at the time and definitely the next day. As the saying goes..."When you drink alcohol you are just borrowing happiness from tomorrow..."
Such a cool saying, never heard it before
Well, I'd like to rewind the clock to before my father passed away, even if just to say goodbye properly. Due to certain conflicts of interest, this will be my last post in this thread. Anyone who would still like to make contact, feel free to do so via Whatsapp or PM.
The floor is all yours, go crazy. (no pun intended of course)
Viper, out!
The floor is all yours, go crazy. (no pun intended of course)
Viper, out!
Don't be a stranger bud, we are all here for you...
This week has been my turn to bare the brunt of the dark cloud...
We moved in to our new house this last weekend which was an exciting, stressful, tiring, joyous, happy, stressful, up and down time. It has been a lot of firsts for me, my first property, my first house, my first renovation, my first big move, etc, etc. so I have tried to just take it as it comes as I really have had no idea what to expect. I have struggled almost from the get go, my anxiety levels have been high the last two or so weeks with me getting little quality sleep and seemingly insignificant events triggering me. I am trying to understand that moving in to a newly renovated house is an ongoing process, I need to leave my perfectionist inclination behind and trust that in the end everything will work out...
We moved in to our new house this last weekend which was an exciting, stressful, tiring, joyous, happy, stressful, up and down time. It has been a lot of firsts for me, my first property, my first house, my first renovation, my first big move, etc, etc. so I have tried to just take it as it comes as I really have had no idea what to expect. I have struggled almost from the get go, my anxiety levels have been high the last two or so weeks with me getting little quality sleep and seemingly insignificant events triggering me. I am trying to understand that moving in to a newly renovated house is an ongoing process, I need to leave my perfectionist inclination behind and trust that in the end everything will work out...
Go with the flow and enjoy the journey @Neuk. Moving is all those things you mentioned for all.
I know I said I won't post here again, but I'm at the end of my rope. Just when I settled in with a psychologist, she's moving to Durban and "dumping" me as well. So the whole process of finding someone would have to start again. Today it seems easier to just give up and save everyone around me from my moods and issues. Haven't slept in two days, can't eat, and just smoke one stinky after the other. Thanks for the time I have spent on this thread, and I hope somewhere, someone learned something positive from my experiences.
Viper, out
Viper, out
Sent by iDad's iPhone
Epic!
Thanks @Andre
It has definitely been one of those experiences where you look back and it was worth all the stress and struggle. We are not completely done moving and getting setup but we are enjoying more and more as each day comes and goes...
You are worth it @Viper_SA, you matter, you are important, you have impact and you are valuable! It is easy to say and harder to do but don't give up the fight, chin up, eyes forward, one foot in front of the other...
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