gotta get me a t-shirt printed with this!
Giggles
- Thread starter Sharrivz
- Start date
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Pick one, I can't do both!"
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
"Getting a little action" means I don't need to take any fibre today.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
"Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
An "all-nighter" means not getting up to pee!
Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Pick one, I can't do both!"
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
"Getting a little action" means I don't need to take any fibre today.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
"Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
"OLD" IS WHEN.....
An "all-nighter" means not getting up to pee!
Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:
You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
That is the truth.. As a biker myself, if he/she don't start, the day is pretty much ruined..
Nothing like a Ford Bakkie
I bought a new Ford F250 Tri-Flex Fuel Truck
that runs on either hydrogen, gasoline or E85.
I returned to the dealer yesterday
because I couldn't get the radio to work.
The technician explained that the radio was voice activated.
'Nelson,' the technician said to the radio
and it immediately replied, 'Ricky or Willie?'
'Willie!' he said and the song, 'On The Road Again'
came from the speakers.
Then he said, 'Ray Charles!', and instantly the song
'Georgia On My Mind' replaced Willie Nelson.
I drove away happy, and for the next few days,
every time I'd say, 'Beethoven,'
I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said,
'Beatles,' I'd get one of their awesome songs.
Yesterday, some guy ran a red light and nearly creamed
my new truck, but I swerved in time to avoid him.
I yelled, 'A@* Hole!'
Immediately the radio responded with:
Ladies and gentlemen,
You can now listen to an address from
THE PRESIDENT OF SOUTH AFRICA.
Damn I love this bakkie..!
@Rob Fisher - Ha Ha - getting old is not for cissies
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haha Derick read this to me the other night from another website, and it is so me, the difference is, I go up to him and ask, did I do something wrong you are very distant, and usual reply is "nah just thinking about a problem" and I'm kewl again
what a smart lady
Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their sex lives.
Karen said, "I call my husband the dentist bcoz nobody can drill like he does."
Joane giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner bcoz of his incredible shaft."
Kathy quietly slipped her whiskey until Joane finally asked, "well, what do u call ur bf?"
Kathy frowned and said, "The Postman. Bcoz he always delivers late and half the time it's in the wrong hole."
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Karen said, "I call my husband the dentist bcoz nobody can drill like he does."
Joane giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner bcoz of his incredible shaft."
Kathy quietly slipped her whiskey until Joane finally asked, "well, what do u call ur bf?"
Kathy frowned and said, "The Postman. Bcoz he always delivers late and half the time it's in the wrong hole."
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Test of age!
A bit of Rugby
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As an Audi driver I do approve!
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