Tell us you're South African

[THE REAPER]

Samp and beans.
Pap en stew.

 

[Stranger]

Samp and beans.
Pap en stew.

Exactly .... on an open fire in the bush.

 

[Stranger]

Why do South Africans laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it.

 

[Stranger]

 

[Stranger]

My pa is groter as you pa

 

[Sharrivz]

I'll tell you just now

See you now now

I know the difference between just now, now now and now, do you?

 

[Sharrivz]

I am loving this thread

 

[Sharrivz]

Ja nee
Mara why?
Ive got a moerse babelas I need some Creme Soda (or I need a green ambulance)
Izzit

I could go on for hours with this I should probably do some work though, but thank you for the laughs forumites!

 

[Stranger]

My pa is groter as you pa

Nee man, my Ma is groter as you pa

 

[Stranger]

Jy is reg jou ma se butthole is groter as my pa

 

[Intuthu Kagesi]

... and one for the Capetonians;

Jou Ma se P##s

 

[Puff the Magic Dragon]

Ja boet

Eina

Sies my kind. Kakkies. Spoeg uit en gooi weg.

Yebo

Jol

 

[Stranger]

niemand in jou ma se gat nie, jy kan 'n Hilux parkeer

 

[Stranger]

Waarom staan u pa se hilux in my oprit

 

[Intuthu Kagesi]

Strond <-Not sure how you spell it?

Eet jy met daai vuil bek?

and two from my SADF days ...

Ek sal you arms afpluk en jou doodslaan met die nat einde

Ek sal you kop afpluk, en in jou longe kak

 

[Adephi]

Haibo

A'we

'Tsek

 

[Kuhlkatz]

Sorry, I was unable to reply earlier because of loadshedding.

 

[Jengz]

Wozzaaa Wozzaaa, swing swing swing, woooooo, straighten boza! Shap shap.

 

[Jengz]

MIEEELIIIIIEEEEEESSSS, DAAAANYAAAA, WATAAAACREEEEEST!

 

[YeOldeOke]

Ja well no fine

 

[Hooked]

 

[RainstormZA]

Time for a braai!!! In the rain!

EDIT: or even in the snow. Lol

 

[supermoto]

I can't say I'm South African because I am actually an Englishman who just happens to live in South Africa

 

[Intuthu Kagesi]

I can't say I'm South African because I am actually an Englishman who just happens to live in South Africa

That's what we call a soutie

 

[zadiac]

Strond <-Not sure how you spell it?

Eet jy met daai vuil bek?

and two from my SADF days ...

Ek sal you arms afpluk en jou doodslaan met die nat einde

Ek sal you kop afpluk, en in jou longe kak

Three corrections:

Stront.

Ek sal jou arms afruk en jou deur die bek moer met die nat kant.

Ek sal jou kop afruk en op jou longe kak.



That's how I remember them AND used them!

So you can imagine my giggles when I came across THIS